Teenage Insecurities

Last night as hubby and I were out walking the beagles, we found ourselves walking behind a couple of high school girls.  They were young, probably no more than 15, and due to our proximity and the decible volume of their voices, I happened to overhear a bit of their conversation.  Below is a somewhat official transcript.

Girl #1:  "Look, I have all this fat skin on my stomach." (Words spoken as she lifts up her t-shirt to expose her stomach).

Girl #2:  "You are so crazy!  Everyone has fat on their stomach."

Girl #1:  "I'm not saying I think I'm fat, I used to think I was fat but not anymore.  But I hate the fat on my stomach, its gross!"

Girl #2:  "But everyone has that, it's not a big deal.  I can see your ab muscles, you are so not fat." (Yes, Girl #1 still has her shirt lifted up).

Girl #1:  "I just wish I could get rid of it.  I exercise, like every day.  Every morning, every afternoon, and I do, like, everything."

Girl #2:  "Well I'm just saying that you aren't fat.  You are so much skinnier than me."

Girl #1:  "Oh my god, you are so not fat!"

I'm really not trying to make fun of these girls (not entirely, anyway).  Because the truth is I remember what it was like to be that age, to suffer through those periods of insecurity, and unfortunately a lot of that insecurity is directly related to one's body image.

As hubby and I kept walking, we eventually veered off in a different direction than the girls.  Once out of sight, we each looked at each other and exchanged knowing smiles.  I secretly thought to myself how thankful I was to no longer be caught up on teenage insecurities...then I wondered if this was, in fact, true. 

I decided a long time ago that I didn't have the energy to be completely superficial.  I don't obsess about my weight, refuse to leave the house without makeup, or worry about how un-tanned my skin is.    

And yet there are still moments of insecurity, moments of comparing myself to others and wondering if something about my outward appearance needs to change in the quest for outward perfection.  There are times when I  yearn for longer legs, a smaller nose, or a flatter stomach.  It seems no matter how comfortable we are in our own skin, there's still a wish list that never quite goes away. 

I am fairly certain these insecurities begin during our teenage years, and I am almost positive that the conversation I overheard could have easily been a carbon copy of various exchanges between my girlfriends and I during high school.  And no, I'm not about to veer off on a rant about how inward beauty is so much more important than outward beauty, blah, blah, blah.  I'll save that speech for the after-school specials.

I guess overall I was struck by the notion of how teenage insecurites don't always go away.  Years from now these girls might still think they are fat, and there will probably be a list of other attributes about their appearances they wish could be changed.  I wonder if they will remember this conversation years from nowm and I wonder how many other teenage girls across the country are having these exact same exchanges with their friends.

Growing up puts a lot of things in persepective, but when it comes to something as cut and dry as physical appearance sometimes it takes even more than the passage of time to help us see and accept ourselves.  I think as teenagers most of us just don't have the life experiences to appreciate this fact.     

All in all, life is too short to worry about a little bit of fat on your stomach.