Woe is Tiger

I really didn't want to write about this, but it's been bugging me all morning so I'm going to just bite the bullet and rant.  Unless you live under a rock, you probably knew that today was the day Tiger Woods was FINALLY going to make a statement (a.k.a. apology) about the mess he made of his personal life by cheating on his wife with about a million different women.  And yes, that "million women" is not an entirely accurate count, but it seems like a new one pops up every day, so just give it time people.

First of all, let me preface this by saying that no, I did not tune in via internet radio, television, or any other media to listen to the press conference.  I did however read a brief recap of the event which in itself was quite riveting, but nonetheless told me that I didn't really miss anything too monumental.  Poor Tiger....the media, his fans, and golfers all over the world have been scrutinizing his life down to the tiniest detail ever since that unfortunate car crash back in November.  The man has not known a moments peace, has been hounded by the press, and has separated from his wife.  He has been so ultimately traumatized by everything that he has been unable to make any sort of statement about anything until three months after the fact.  Shame on you, media, for intimidating him so much.  Can't you see that the gravity of this situation has rocked him to the core?  (On a side note, I am hoping that my intended sarcasm is leaking through.  It would be much easier to pick up on that if this were a vlog instead of a blog).

I'm not a huge fan of golf, but even I know that Tiger Woods is literally the best golf player in the entire world.  I'm not going to sit here and rattle off his stats and talk up his athletic ability, because frankly that is irrelevant to the situation at hand.  Tiger Woods is, by all means and purposes, a celebrity.  He is (well, was) the face of professional golf and will continue to be so probably well after his career is over.  When you are a celebrity, you leave the realm of normalcy where the rest of us lowly minions dwell and are elevated to a stature of supreme pampering and idolization....people literally want to BE you.  If you ask me, that's a lot of pressure.

When this whole fiasco first became public, people were absolutely shocked, dumbfounded, even confused.  I mean, this was Tiger Woods we were talking about....a celebrity.....an idol.....they never make mistakes.....or do they??  See here's the thing, you strip away the sponsorships, the fancy golf gear, the multi-million dollar bank account, and what you have is a normal guy who happns to be really talented at hitting a little white ball into these little holes on a golf course.  What if Tiger Woods was everyday Joe Schmo at the local golf course just beating everyone left and right but never trying to take his game to the next level?  What if he was the one who cheated on his wife with all these women?  I sincerely doubt he would be hounded by every press outlet from here to Great Britian, and I doubt even more that he would check himself into a clinic for sex therapy.  No, I think Joe Schmo and his wife might divorce, and he would continue sleeping around kicking butt on the local golf course.

But wait, you say.  Tiger Woods is NOT this hypothetical Joe Schmo.  He is a real person who is in the spotlight, who thousands of people admire and idolize, so when he makes a mistake of this magnitude in his personal life we have a RIGHT to know about it!  The public demands answers and he must speak to us!  You can spout that nonsense all you want but when you get right down to it, that's garbage.  We might have a right to know about Tiger's performance on the golf course in nation-wide competitions, but his personal life is exactly that: his personal life.  If Tiger cheats on his wife, wears bikini underwear, and likes to eat beef jerky in bed, that's all well and good but there is absolutely no legitimate reason why we, the general public, have to know that stuff.  We are a culture of voyeuristic bloodhounds, and when we pick up a scent all we can think is, Give me more....give me more.

And that is exactly what bothered me so much about today's exclusive press conference.  It was basically just throwing meat to a pack of hungry wolves to tide them over until the next barage of accusations and rumors build up, then it will be time for Tiger to face the music once again.  In case you haven't heard anything about this morning's momentous event, let me give you the short and sweet: Tiger apologized and doesn't know when he will return to professional golf.  He apologized to a room full of reporters, while his wife is off in Sweden or who knows where, and she is the person he should be apologizing to.  Maybe he has already and I just didn't see it in the news....who knows, but how sincere does anyone think this apology really was?  I'm going out on a limb to say this is a classic case not of, "I'm legitimately sorry for what I did and truly want to make things right," but more along the lines of, "I'm really sorry that I got caught and called out on these horrible things I did.  Had I not been caught I would probably continue with what I was doing, but now that everything is out in the open I am going to say sorry in the hopes that it will all go away."

Look, I'm not trying to get up on my high horse and say that Tiger should be burned at the stake.  I think the majority of us have a basic sense of right and wrong, and if asked all of us (I hope) would say that cheating on your spouse is wrong.  No way to talk yourself out of that.  Tiger cheated on his wife, therefore he is in the wrong.  Just like our buddy Joe Schmo.  I guess what I am most annoyed about is that we have to have this whole media circus surrounding the incident, when really there is nothing newsworthy to report.  Why should we care about this?  Why should we care about any of the hundreds of thousands of stories that are published each and every day about celebrities?  Things like this happen to us real people all the time, but no one is beating down my door to ask me questions like what designer top will I be wearing out to dinner with my husband on Saturday night (Alfani, in case anyone wanted to know).

Tiger screwed up, and now he'll probably end up getting a divorce.  He has apologized, although I'm still not sure to whom.....his fans?  Other golfers?  His caddy?  The woman who bags his groceries?  Maybe all these people and more, this incident seems to have affected a lot of lives.  I'm just tired of the staged apologies and our incessant need to have all the dirty details about the lives of people we don't even know.  I realize that celebrity athletes, actors, writers, etc. often are powerless to control the amount of access that people demand into their personal lives.  But I for one have had enough. 

We hold these people up to impossible standards by literally expecting them to be perfect in every way.  Then when they fail, we take it as a personal attack against us and everyone who admires them.  Human beings were not designed to be perfect on the golf course or in their personal lives.  The sooner people realize this the less we'll have to hear about Tiger.