On gambling

I recently returned from a trip to Reno with the hubby and his business partners.  It felt so amazing to get away, even for just a few days.  And even though my fantasy of sitting poolside all day long while sipping fruity drinks didn't quite come into fruition (the weather was not very warm), a good time was still had by all (and there were still many fruity drinks consumed). 

Reno is known as the biggest little city in the world, and while not quite as popular as Las Vegas, it is still something of a gambling destination.  Casinos rule the town, slot machines rule the airport, and just about everywhere you turn there is another opportunity for you to throw money away on something.  I was not naive enough to believe that we would go on this trip and not end up losing some money to the casinos.  Considering we had an $11 per day casino fee tacked on to our bill at checkout, we were losing money whether we wanted to or not.  This was not the first time I had been to a casino, but it was the first time I had been to one with the actual intention of gambling.  

Now see, even that isn't entirely true.  I am not a fan of gambling, and while I don't hold anything against people who do happen to enjoy it, it is not my cup of tea.  I have never been able to wrap my mind around the idea of willingly throwing money away for absolutely no reason.  Yes, I have heard the old adage you have to play big to win big, but how often does that really happen?  I am willing to be the odds are pretty low (no pun intended). 

So the first night there my husband and his buddies decide to play a little blackjack.  After standing behind them for a good ten minutes bored out of my mind, I decided to try my hand at the penny slots.  I figure I can handle the idea of penny wagers, plus if I sit at the machine long enough I am guaranteed a free drink.  I find a machine, sit down, and search through my wallet for a small bill to enter.  Of course all I have are $20 bills.  Okay, I tell myself.  I'll just play for awhile then cash out and use the rest on another night.  I start playing the machine and before long I'm down about $3.  Getting frustrated I decide to up the ante.  Instead of only betting one line I go up to 15 lines, then 20.  This of course costs more money, so that loss of $3 quickly turns into a loss of $6 and then $7.  Throughout I made some small gains, but then of course I had to re-wager my winnings in order to keep getting ahead.  I worked my way back up to $15 before cashing out, but over the next two days I probably lost around $20 in the penny slots.  Who knows, it probably was more.  After awhile you kind of start to lose track. 

I realize that my losings don't really stack up to the hundreds and sometimes thousands of dollars that people often lose at casinos, but in my mind it was significant.  That $20 could have bought me a new shirt, or dinner, or a new book.  Instead it's sitting in the belly of a penny slot machine, lost to me forever.  And all it took was the pressing of a button over and over again.  

I did a lot of people watching while in the different casinos we visited and realized something else.  All the commercials you see on TV for resort casinos with the young, healthy, well-dressed people are slightly off mark.  Maybe Vegas is a different story, but in all the casinos I visited I found, let's just say, an interesting mix of individuals.  In a way it was kind of depressing.  All these people sitting around at a table staring at cards, or sitting at a slot machine mindlessly pressing buttons while lights flashed and loud noises reverberated around them in all directions.  It didn't necessarily strike me as a happy place, because frankly I didn't see too many people smiling.

All in all I was somewhat fascinated by the casino culture, and spent a lot more time people watching than I did gambling.  From this trip I learned that I am definitely not a gambler, and in fact get no joy out of the process whatsoever.  But while I was sitting there at that machine pressing that wager button over and over again, I definitely fell into the gambling trance.  Every time I would lose I thought, I'll make it up on the next round.  This thought surprisingly brought me an ounce of calmness, and as the lines were spinning on each ensuing round I eagerly waited to see if this time would in fact be my lucky break.  

It's a fascinating and dangerous idea that simply by pressing a button or rolling some dice you can instantly find yourself richer by thousands of dollars.  And even if you don't gamble on a regular basis, even if you don't necessarily enjoy the process, this is still the idea, the dream that sits in the back of your mind.  It's what causes people to sit hour after hour at the poker tables and slot machines, long after they have fallen deep into the hole of debt.  

It's a strange form of hope that constantly lingers, even after your money has left you.